Actual Vigilante Yuri Petrov (
lunadickery) wrote2011-12-20 03:02 am
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IT ONLY TOOK FOREVER, but Yuri's finally past 1,000 comments. Thus! To celebrate, ask me anything. First impressions, thoughts on canon, requests for porn (You will deeply regret making this decision if you ask me for porn.), anything!
I will get to them when I wake up in the afternoon.
I will get to them when I wake up in the afternoon.
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A lot of the stuff from the red thread essay still applies, but to expound more on their relationship from Yuri's point of view...
Yuri hates him. Loathes him. He hates Hisoka more than camp! Actually, he's kind of created this association between Hisoka and camp, and part of the reason why camp is so evil is because Hisoka is in it and he cannot die. He knows full well that Hisoka is toying with him because there's nothing that Yuri can really do to permanently harm him, and that just makes Yuri hate him more.
He's also really terrified of Hisoka, scared of him in a way that he has not been frightened since he was teenager. He doesn't want to engage Hisoka in fights because he knows that it's mostly futile, but he can't and won't run away. There's too much for him to lose if he runs away, so he's constantly struggling with this combination of fear, anger, hatred, and frustration every time he's around him. These emotions also make him lose control, which is extremely troubling for him when he's out and about as Judge Yuri Petrov because there exists a chance of him slipping up and saying or doing something that will give away his identity as Lunatic.
SO BASICALLY, Yuri hates Hisoka and considers him to be his main enemy in camp. CONGRATS?
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It's not that he doesn't like Klavier, it's just that Klavier isn't very lawyer like, which gets points subtracted from him because he's supposed to be one! And seriously, what is up with LA's justice system? The police department have mascots, the lawyers look and act oddly, the detectives are grumpy, blah blah blah Yuri Petrov's thoughts on what is wrong with the state of the world.
Klavier did get points for not wanting to kiss him, though! Because the only thing worse than being forced to kiss someone is being forced to kiss someone who's eager about it.
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Let's see, does he know that people can't die in Camp yet? And if so, or when he does, how is he... dealing with that? :]
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YES, HE DOES. Red thread caused him and Hisoka to kill each other many times, so he is very intimate with that fact now.
He didn't cope well at all for the longest time! I essayed about it a bit before, but the fact that death is permanent is part of the reason why he's so gung-ho about killing criminals. It's permanent solution! In camp, death is not permanent, so he's at a loss because there is no permanent solution, and death is so embarrassingly temporary that it doesn't seem to do anything at all.
That dealt a blow to his ego. The fact that there are people much stronger than him here also dealt a blow to his ego. That his powers aren't even effective against plant life dealt him yet another blow to his ego. Thus his mockery of Origami Cyclone, whom he knows for certain will never be able to match him, no matter where they are. (In the unlikely even that Origami ever hurts him, Yuri will probably cry and not leave his room for a few days.)
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or hope that I have good luck on a day that you happen to have bad luckno subject
Every day is a day where he has bad luck in camp!no subject
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SERIOUSLY THOUGH, he doesn't know what to make of Hazama because other than that costume insulting bit, he hasn't actually interacted with him. HOWEVER, he knows that Hazama and Hisoka...hang out, for lack of a better term, and anyone who does that can't be good news.
...No, really, MY OUTFIT IS FABULOUS; YOU LOOK LIKE A DANDY
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...
I also want terrible porn.
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In some ways, not having Hero TV and the sponsoring corporations around is a huge relief to him. Yuri abhors the entire Hero TV process, and not having its influence around to make him irritable is very liberating! Of course, there are much worse things than Hero TV in camp, but it's almost nice to be able to act without having spotlights in his face and helicopters flying around.
Having the Heroes in camp is super interesting to Yuri in several ways. First, with camp being nothing like Stern Bild, this is a perfect chance for him to see just how strong their convictions are. There are no TVs, no points, no sponsors, so how will the Heroes act and behave? Will they actually attempt to keep the peace, or will they merely close their eyes to the injustices of camp now that no one is forcing them to do so? He wants to test their justice, wants to see whether or not their false justice is as paper thin and weak as he thinks it is. He's looking for proof that it is weak and false, but if the Heroes manage to do something right anyway, it'll be a pleasant surprise for him as well.
...Bad porn will come later.
You asked for it...
"What are you doing?" He lifted himself on his elbow, trying to ensure, as specifics Burnaby asked.
"Trying to find a lubricant," Steel said. He was a little obscure, was a marked improvement from the previous 10 minutes, six times before he was in Burnaby when you had to repeat his statement, but that he tries to have sex. "And the condom. Condom is good."
Glasses was also good. Where did he do? "Glasses."
It hit a steel wall at the ominous crack threw anything away from the bed. "What?"
"Glasses. What is my glasses?"
"Well," said stepped steel. Crunch under his feet something, and he winced. "Awe."
"... Do you have to do."
"I think I found the glasses," was the reply, and his legs wobble and lift the steel as a peer when he stepped on something dangerously. "Yeah."
"You just broke my glasses," said Burnaby. He sat on a fixed steel angriest glare and squint while her husband was intoxicated him.
Steel is down and he waved back, I forgot to put his feet, almost collapsed. "I did not intend to not. Do you have a pair of the owners? Of spades? Spuds? Extra."
"Spare," said Burnaby, Hadith remembered that steel broke his glasses. "You broke my glasses."
"You have them. Spare. I'll get a spare pair with you." Flashing Steel confusion. "It sounds strange."
"There are a pair of nightstand drawer. In the glass." Then he remembered that the contents of the drawer next to heaven was here on the bed. "Oh."
His eyes narrowed in some sense that some things like eyeglasses in his eyes and brought near, rummaged through the contents. None of them did. In his attempt to find a spare pair to shuffle the items, keep throwing them into the steel wall opposite the bed room, was prevented by.
A few minutes later, triumphantly raised above his head suddenly something steel. "Aha!" He said, and Burnaby, details on the object, he hoped it was the glasses.
"You are my glasses looking for?"
"No," ringing steel is very proud of himself waving his hand to his face what was before him, said. "I found the lubricant!"
Burnaby is, we want to kick the heavens, he was. Steel and squeaked, and destroy what he had, and poked the air snatched it over Burnaby.
"This," he said, "with no lubricant. They are eyedrops. Eyes."
"Huh," Steel said. He swept the contents of a night stand from the bed, crawling on top of Burnaby and half-half collapse Hadith. "Maybe we do not need a luge. The lute.'s Lubrication?"
Burnaby kicked empty again.
"Awe."
"Stop."
"I'm trying," murmured to the type of steel Burnaby, Hadith and headed to the pits for aimlessly around his crotch area. "What is this?"
"That," said Burnaby, "is my penis."
"Why is software Oooooh."
"Get off," said Burnaby was again, this time in the steel, rolled off the sky and listened. "I," Burnaby is "going to look for my glasses." Sitting on it
"Then?"
"I do not know," said Burnaby, down from the bed and then he walked toward the closet. Or at least, he tried to walk toward the closet, there was something he could not see lying on the floor, and, being drunk, he stumbled on it Failed to right itself. He fell to the ground.
"Are you okay?" Came the muffled voice from the bed of steel.
"No," replied Burnaby.
"Okay," Steel said.
And they that night, has laid off six.
OKAY THE REAL ONE NOW
"What are you doing?" Barnaby asked as he lifted himself onto his elbows and squinted in an attempt to see.
"Trying to find the lube," Kotetsu said. He was slurring only slightly, which was a marked improvement from ten minutes ago, when he had to repeat his sentence six times before Barnaby got that he wanted to have sex. "And condoms. Condoms are good."
Glasses were also good. Where were his? "Glasses."
Kotetsu threw something away from the bed, where it hit the wall with an ominous crack. "What?"
"Glasses. Where are my glasses?"
"Uh," Kotetsu said and stepped back. Something crunched beneath his feet, and he winced. "Ow."
"...What did you do."
"I think I found your glasses," was the reply, and Kotetsu lifted up a foot and wobbled dangerously as he peered at what he stepped on. "Yep."
"You just broke my glasses," Barnaby said. He sat up and fixed Kotetsu with the angriest glare he could make while drunk and squinting.
Kotetsu waved his hands and nearly fell over because he forgot to put his foot back down. "I didn't mean to. Don't you have pairs? Spades? Spuds? Extras."
"Spares," Barnaby said, then remembered that Kotetsu broke his glasses. "You broke my glasses."
"You have them. Spares. I'll get you a spare pair." Kotetsu blinked in confusion. "That sounds weird."
"There's a pair in the nightstand drawer. Of glasses." Then he remembered that the contents of the drawer were currently next to him on the bed. "Oh."
He rummaged through the contents, bringing them close to his eyes and squinting at anything that may have felt somewhat like glasses. None of them were. His attempt at finding a spare pair was hindered by Kotetsu, who kept shuffling through the items and throwing them against the wall on the other side of the bedroom.
After a few minutes, Kotetsu suddenly raised something triumphantly over his head. "Aha!" he said, and Barnaby squinted at the object and wished it were his glasses.
"Did you find my glasses?"
"No," Kotetsu said, sounding immensely proud of himself as he waved the whatever it was in front of his face. "I found the lube!"
Barnaby wanted to kick him, so he did. Kotetsu squeaked and dropped what he was holding, and Barnaby leaned over and snatched it out of the air.
"This," he said, "is not lube. They are eyedrops. For eyes."
"Huh," Kotetsu said. He swept the contents of the nightstand off the bed, and then half-collapsed and half-crawled on top of Barnaby. "Maybe we don't need the luge. Lute. Lube?"
Barnaby kicked him again.
"Ow."
"Get off."
"I'm trying," Kotetsu muttered into Barnaby's shoulder, and then proceeded to grope aimlessly around the area of his crotch. "What is this?"
"That," Barnaby said, "is my penis."
"Why is soft—Oooooh."
"Get off," Barnaby said again, and this time Kotetsu listened, rolling off him. "I am," Barnaby said, sitting up, "going to find my glasses."
"And then?"
"I don't know," Barnaby said, and then he got out of the bed and walked towards the closet. Or, at least, he attempted to walk towards the closet, but there was something lying on the floor that he could not see, and, being drunk, was unable to right himself when he tripped over it. He fell to the ground.
"Are you okay?" came Kotetsu's muffled voice from the bed.
"No," Barnaby replied.
"Okay," said Kotetsu.
And they did not have sex that night.
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Seriously, Yuri can't quite believe that Rain...exists. NO ONE IS THAT NAIVE. NO ONE. Especially someone who's supposedly immortal. IMPOSSIBLE. Anyone living that long must have developed the worst cast of misanthropy that could ever exist, and he refuses to believe otherwise.
So! For Rain to have said what he said, there can be only two explanations (In Yuri's mind)
1. He is lying and this is some kind of elaborate trap set up by Hisoka
2. Rain has been alive too long and therefore has completely lost it.
He waffles between the two constantly, because Rain is...Rain and he doesn't know how to deal with him. And then some of the things Rain said to Lunatic edged uncomfortably close to, "Things I hear my hallucination of my dead father say to me," so now Yuri wants to believe in these two explanations even more. SOMEONE LIKE RAIN CANNOT ACTUALLY EXIST. NOPE. Part of his worldview might crumble if he accepted it as true.
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JUSTICE
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...better response to come later.
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He can't get frustrated or angry at her because she is just a child, but it really makes him uncomfortable to be around her because WHAT IF SHE ASKS THE WRONG QUESTIONS. Worse, what if she asks the right questions? What is he supposed to say? Should he be honest? Cover it up with white lies? Derail the conversation? He has no idea what the right thing to do is, so he's in this state of paranoia where he hopes that she won't ask him about his DEEP THOUGHTS ON JUSTICE because he really does not know what to tell her.
Also, he thinks that Yotsuba may have super powers or something. IT'S NOT UNHEARD OF FOR KIDS TO BE REALLY STRONG. Oh, god, what if she hurts someone with her powers and hates herself forever. WHAT. DO.